When air alerts leave a child struggling: what home and school can do

What the evidence explains, and what it cannot say about your child

Ukraine’s 2022/23 HBSC survey describes participating adolescents’ well-being. It signals a need for support, but cannot diagnose an individual student. We use the published summary, not individual responses. [1]

UNICEF reports restricted access to classroom learning. This is a different issue and measure, not the prevalence of anxiety disorders. [6] We therefore do not combine it with international school-pressure figures into an apparent trend of war’s effects.

Parents and teachers should notice changes in this particular child: what has become harder, how long it has lasted, and whether sleep, learning and relationships are affected. Tiredness alone does not mean a disorder. Equally, “everyone is struggling now” should not dismiss an individual’s difficulties.

After a night in shelter: agree what today will look like

Imagine a test in the morning after a child barely slept because of alerts. A parent or guardian can write: “It was a difficult night and my child had little sleep. Could we postpone the test and keep one main task today?”. Personal details do not belong in the class group chat.

The teacher states what matters today, what can wait and when the arrangement will be reviewed. For example: “Reading the example is enough now. We will return to the problem on Thursday.” This is a RealSkills discussion proposal, not a universal assessment rule.

Do not simply move all missed work to tomorrow. When interruptions recur, the class teacher can coordinate demands across subjects. The child should not have to explain a different deadline publicly.

During an alert and after returning

During danger, follow local procedures and responsible adults’ instructions. The education ministry advises remaining in shelter, communicating calmly and avoiding reading a stream of alarming news aloud to children. [4] Do not promise that “nothing will happen”.

Simple words can help: “I’m here. We are following our plan.” Do not demand accounts of frightening experiences, hug without consent or make everyone do a calming exercise. Avoid activities that obstruct movement or safety in a crowded shelter.

After return is permitted, briefly remind students where work stopped and offer an easier first step, an example or a discussion about pausing. The aim is access to learning, not an identical pace for everybody.

Who agrees what: parents, child and school

This list is for parents or guardians, class teachers, subject teachers, school leaders and the school psychologist. The child participates but is not responsible for organising support.

1. The class teacher and child: identify an adult the child feels comfortable approaching. That adult explains private contact options and who covers their absence.
2. Teachers and parents, with the child’s views: agree one or two priorities, a manageable deadline and a review date. Teachers explain how assessment will be handled.
3. School leaders: explain whom to tell about bullying and who will respond. A child experiencing violence must not be left to “sort things out” with those responsible.
4. Parents and the school psychologist: agree who will help access a professional if everyday support is insufficient. Without a school psychologist, leaders help identify an available route.

Do not create public mood or diagnosis spreadsheets. If danger comes from the family, involve another safe adult and appropriate services rather than relying only on notifying parents.

One conversation does not replace everyday support

WHO treats the school as a supportive environment, not merely a venue for isolated exercises. [2] A social-emotional learning meta-analysis evaluated organised programmes; it does not establish that our checklist works. [5]

The practical staff question is whether agreements actually happen. Did the student get the promised time? Do they know an adult to contact? Have postponed tests collided? Check arrangements rather than publicly surveying the class’s “resilience”.

Before adopting a programme, ask which ages it serves, how facilitators are trained, whether it fits your setting and how difficult reactions are supported. Results abroad do not guarantee the same effects in a Ukrainian school during war.

When professional help is needed

WHO stresses sleep, supportive settings and access to help for adolescents. [3] If difficulties persist, worsen or interfere substantially with everyday life, parents should contact a family doctor or qualified mental-health professional. Do not wait for school adjustments to “work” when there is serious concern.

A teacher can describe observations but does not diagnose. An immediate threat to life or safety calls for emergency help and appropriate services, not another exercise from this article. Adults should not promise absolute secrecy about danger; explain who needs to be involved.

A teenager can start with: “I’m struggling. Can you help me find someone to talk to?”. If the first adult does not listen, approach another safe adult. You do not have to prove that things are “bad enough” before asking.

A short agreement for the next school days

RealSkills practical framework; not measured study results.